Monday, May 12, 2008

jess hutch opening, fido and the alchemist plus a lot of bitching about a baby's name

jess hutch's "villagers" opening was this friday at schmancy! not only was there pbr

but there was also a lotlotlot of awesome stuff!

don't forget, if you'd like to pick up one of jess' pieces, there are still some available!

since this weekend was mother's day (*shudder*) i gave my step mom a call. (i'm a fairly well behaved step daughter. really, i am. i mean, aside from all the cursing...)

anyway, we spent a lot of time talking about my baby bro's choice in names for his fetus. (it's a boy as well, it appears.)

can i ask you readers a favor? can you PLEASE leave a comment or shoot me an email if you think naming your soon to be kid after a bbq restaurant is a bad idea? (thankfully, he's not considering "leonard'spit" as a name for his first born but his choice isn't much better, imho.) 'cause i'm not calling his kid something that goes good with a side of slaw, dammit and it would be nice if i could have a general consensus to back me up. i mean, my brother really likes bbq. obviously. so it's gonna' take a lot of persuasion.

many thanks in advance!

lessee...what else has been like sand in my bathing suit this weekend? ah, yes! the motherfucking alchemist.

i spent about an hour bumping up the bad reviews for it on amazon yesterday, THAT'S how much i hate it.

if leff didn't have to read it for his book club, i'd delightfully shred it page by page and stick it in my compost so no one else would accidentally pick it up and read it. that's how much i hate it.

and you guys know how much i hate shredding things, right? (our shredder is really loud.)

but do you know what i love? "fido". 'cause not only is it jewel toned and candy colored but it also has zombies.

if the alchemist had zombies that were on a quest for their (*giggling*) "Personal Legend", i might've liked it.

no. no i wouldn't have. no amount of carnage can save anything from a book that beats you over the head with such a laughable term as the capitalized "Personal Legend".

k, i need to go harangue my brother about the name again. for reals, kids. if i'm ever allowed to see his kid i'm calling it "allen" regardless of what kind of sauce it's likely to be christened with.


Anonymous said...

the Alchemist is soooo cheezy! Here is a particularly unfavorable and funny review I found, maybe Jason can use it for his book club:

"...I found myself praying to the God of Literature that the boy's beloved sheep would stampeded and trample him to death, sparing me from the Demons of Boredom. If you liked the Celestine Prophecy you'll love The Alchemist. You can read it while you're waiting for the mothership to return."

PS: bbq baby names? I vote NO!

r4kk4 said...

damn but that's a good review!!! thank you for that!

let me tell you, if the nephew fetus is called what my little bro is threatening, i'll start sending my brother school buses on his bday again.

i'll do it!!

(sorry, it's an inside joke that drives my brother INSANE!!! i'll explain it to you later if you'd like.)